Because he was outstanding in his field!
Now this picture is the holy grail of all dad jokes and if I could write every single one of this with this picture, that’ll be great. But since there’s tonnes that I’ve collected, I’m just going to list my top 20 dad jokes. Get a needle and thread ready because you’ll be in stitches by the end of it!
P.S: this listicle is going to be GIF heavy.
1. Whenever the cashier at the grocery store asks my dad if he would like the milk in a bag he replies, ‘No, just leave it in the carton!’
2. Why did the hostler give the pony a glass of water? Because he was a little hoarse!
3. Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was a salted.
4.
5. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
6. Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.
7. What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well dressed man on a bicycle? Attire.
8. What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Aye Matey!
9.
10. Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.
11. What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, it just waved.
12. Did you hear that the police have a warrant out on a midget psychic ripping people off? It reads “Small medium at large.”
13. Breaking news! Energizer Bunny arrested – charged with battery.
14. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
15.
16. “Doctor, I’ve broken my arm in several places”
Doctor: “Well don’t go to those places.”
17. What do you call a gorilla with two bananas in his ears? Anything you want, he can’t hear you.
18. What did the grape do when he got stepped on? He let out a little wine.
19.
20. Did you hear about the musician that died? He’s started to decompose.
BONUS:
I asked my dad for his best dad joke and he said, ‘You.’
Congratulations! You’ve made it to the end of the list.
Here’s your certificate: