Father’s Day is just a few days away! And we hope you’ve made reservation, plans, gifts and all that jazz. But before your celebrations, we’ve got some amazing articles brewing that’s been waiting for your attention since yesterday till this Saturday!
Fathers are like pillars to a child’s behavioral-building.
For a girl, a father is her pillar of relationships and emotional support. And it will shape her way of forming bonds as well as what she will look to, when she looks for a partner. For a boy, he follows in the footsteps of his father that will shape his core values and behavior, into the man that he’ll eventually be.
In the days to come, Sevenpie will be releasing stories from Malaysian fathers from all corners and walks of life. Within these articles, they share about life in a non-stop commitment to their bundle(s)-of-joy, and how they have coped with it no matter the circumstance.
As cheesy as it sounds, love, when unbound, can truly move mountains. And Gordon Ling is nothing short of that. Founder of Reanimated Productions, Gordon shares his journey of hardships and sacrifices that will touch your hearts and move you. And how to deal with all of those unexpected hurdles, whilst hustling to make things happen for yourself and the family.
So get comfy, and grab your dad because these few articles are reads that you don’t want to ignore. Take a glimpse into the lives of these unsung heroes as you discover that a man’s love is unstoppable, and little to big miracles can happen.
Gordon Ling– Director of Reanimated Productions; Father of One: Caitlyn
While life is sometimes filled with uncertainties, Gordon was hit with an unexpected one which involves huge sacrifices that no one can ever imagine- having to struggle with his wife’s chronic kidney failure at her second trimester. This is a true Malaysian story about miracles and a father’s sacrifice.
We’ve spoken to Gordon about two years ago here when Gordon had just welcomed a new addition to the family – Caitlyn! While putting together this Father’s Day Special Edition, the team from Sevenpie knew for sure that we have to get Gordon on board again to share his heart-warming story about his journey to make fatherhood possible. Read on to see how the pair has pushed through against adversities, all for their own miracle baby, Caitlyn.
1. Hi, Gordon! It’s so good to have you back once more – and this time for our Special Father’s Day Edition! Two years ago, you became a new father to Caitlyn! What are some of the most exciting things about fatherhood for you so far?
Hi Sevenpie! Thanks for having me once again! Time passed by too quickly and my daughter is 3 years old already! It’s been an adventurous journey so far and I’m still learning to be a good father.
2. Could you share with us what is your favourite father-daughter time together with Caitlyn?
At some mornings when she just woke up, she would climb over to my side of the bed, stare at me for a moment and then say “I love you papa…” – and my day is off to a great start.
3. We’ve heard about the admirable decision you made during your wife’s pregnancy. Surely, it wasn’t an easy period to go through. Can you share with us more about it?
My wife had end-stage chronic kidney failure and we’ve only discovered it during the beginning of the second trimester. Then, we were told that the pregnancy is high risk to the mother and was advised to terminate the baby. Knowing the risk that follows from it, we were rejected by a few hospitals.
We never gave up searching for a hospital, and in the end, we were accepted at Hospital Kuala Lumpur because government hospitals won’t reject patients. We spent the next few months in the hospital until our miracle baby was born. You can find the whole story in my Facebook blog here. 🙂
4. That experience definitely was something that you did not expect to happen. How has it affected you emotionally at that time?
Imagine someone asking you to choose your wife or your baby – no words could describe how I felt at that time. We had a new problem to face every day during the pregnancy. Despite the struggles, we decided to believe God and let God lead us. We told ourselves that this was the child that God had promised us and that it’s worth fighting for – and so we did.
5. How did you cope with your fears and emotions knowing that you need to support your wife as well?
In all honesty, I think my wife is the one who kept me strong and moving. She was the one asking me to stop crying 🙂
My wife carried our baby and went through all the suffering – needing surgery to insert a tube near her neck for blood dialysis throughout the pregnancy and also a few months after. If there were any support we could get, I think my wife deserved it the most. Her strength really kept me going.
6. How has that experience grown you as a person and changed the way you look at life?
That experience has grown both my wife and me as a couple, as new parents, and as humans.
We’ve learned to face crisis with a reasonably calm manner, make decisions and take responsibilities. Our problems wouldn’t just disappear, so there is no excuse to just run away. There is no way out, only a way forward. And our journey hasn’t ended: my wife is still doing dialysis and our daughter, growing beautifully.
7. That truly was a noble sacrifice that you’ve made for your family. Could you share with us what are some of the uncompromisable values you’ve built in your family?
My wife told me this when I was facing a company’s big down-time for the first time, and when we had little to none (not even enough to get married!): “Thank God for what you have, Trust God for what you need”.
Today, we still keep and tell ourselves these words. But it doesn’t just stop there, we believe in taking action. We may pray and trust God, but Words + Actions = Results. I think it’s unreasonable to pray and let God do the work. It’s like praying and believing God for money but doing nothing about it. Don’t just pray – do something and God will bless it.
8. We also know that Reanimated Productions has recently moved to a new office! With a greater year ahead also comes with more responsibilities. How do you balance your work as well as being a father at the same time?
Good question, I’m also still learning to balance life!
No matter how hard we hustle, there is no perfect balance in it because one side demands our attention more at its own time. But, I always make it a point to ask how my wife’s and daughter’s day went. Probably nothing much has happened for them and they missed being with me the entire day, or they could have had an exciting that and can’t wait to share it with me. So, the usual “daddy response” like: “Don’t disturb me” or “I’m tired” – isn’t really the best answer.
Although I may be tired, I learn to find rest with them. Spending time with each other doesn’t mean to ‘do something’. What matters most, is just means being there for them.
9. Years from now, Caitlyn may be reading this! What message do you have for her?
Oh, I’m so prepared for this! I do a time capsule diary vlog for her that is available in my YouTube channel here (more videos coming soon). So I have stuff for her to see when she’s a little older. But if I have to leave her a message here, I would say: “You’ll always be my princess”.
10. Lastly, any pieces of advice for fathers out there who might be going through the same struggles, such as what you went through, of their wife’s pregnancy complications?
I think we’ve come to an era where social media pressure is such a huge taboo in every relationship. We are always considering how others would look at us as couples whenever we are at a certain phase in our life. I would advise to not make decisions because of what others think because it brings no value to ‘sustain’ your reputation.
Instead, I believe being real is what gives relationships sustainability. As a father, prioritize your family first, not your so-called, non-existing ‘you know who am I?’ reputation. Being with your family matters a lot more than trying to salvage the problem because you’re afraid of what others might think of you and your wife.