Let’s hear how Jmie shares her journey after becoming a mother!
Adele: Hi Jmie.
Jmie: Hi I’m Jmie, I do YouTube videos, then maybe some content on IG.
Adele: OMG I miss them at this size. He won’t sit still, baby say hi.
Jmie: Say hi hello.
Adele: Baby grows up really fast.
Jmie: She likes to watch the screen. When she sees the screen she will be quiet.
Adele: Of course because daddy mommy’s business. As far as you are yourself, how did you step into the industry of content creators at that time?
Jmie: In the beginning, I was a video host in online media. So when I went in to do it, I was like a host, and then there’s like behind the scenes. At that time, I was on this platform for about two years, then I met my husband. I was in Sabah with him, and the two also went to shoot together. Then we are in the same group, and then we live in a room, I sleep in the bed above him, the one he chose. Because I arrived late, when I arrived there were not many bed options. They are all on the top bunk, and then I choose to be on top of his bed, then we got to know each other like this.
Adele: Do boys and girls share the same room? Can it be like this?
Jmie: Yes, five or six in one room, what can you do? Because he came to Malaysia to shoot content, and come to play. He sleeps in other people’s houses, he’s kinda couchsurfing like that. At that time, I lent my house to him to sleep. Many people say, hey, you are so good, maybe it’s because of his good looks.
Adele: Yes, it must be.
Jmie: We started to do some couple’s content together because he used to do YouTube alone.
Adele: I think it’s you at work, after all, you’re really working with your husband, right? Then between work, children and family, how do you arrange your time and what kind of tips can you share with us?
Jmie: I actually only recently got hold of this thing. This is because even before I had CJ, I was a workaholic, working 24 hours a day. You know that influencer, there is no morning and evening, no weekday weekend, no rest time at all. This is because I like this job, I like to do it all the time, to be busy all the time. Then until I got CJ, I also hired a kakak, and it became too much to handle at once, I can’t get used to it. Later, I felt that when I rest properly, I can be more productive. My mind has been working for the past three months and it made me feel a little sluggish.
Adele: This is because your capacity can be more but your time is still the same. After having a child, life is very different, it must be getting along with my husband. Then when you disagree with Curtis, how did you solve it?
Jmie: I am very glad that he is willing to communicate then listen to me and listen to my feedback. I’m the kind of person I can’t communicate with, I think he is more angmo style then I‘m more Malaysian. Some things, I don’t say it directly, I just bear it in my heart. I feel afraid that what I say will affect his mood, not good for him, or what. Then he is very direct, he can tell me. When I try to learn to communicate with him, it’s he who guides me, he will tell me, hey, what are you unhappy about, let’s make it clear now.
When we’re done talking, we throw this thing away, let’s not bring it up again. I sometimes feel wronged, this is also necessary, the other party thinks, hey, understand my grievance. Then I have to understand why they don’t feel my grievance. It’s that everyone has his own differences.
Adele: Point of view, you must understand the communication style of the other party. Because like every boss, if you are the boss now, you have employees, you also know that each employee has a different style of speaking to the boss, not to mention a husband and wife, right? Now that you have become a parent, are you going to have a second or third child?
Jmie: I’m not going to have yet.
Adele: Do you have any thoughts on your child’s future education perspective?
Jmie: I’m a casual mom. I didn’t say anything like just going to study all the time, but I have seen a little bit.
Adele: I’m exactly like you, and I don’t.
Jmie: Just follow the flow, she can do whatever she wants. It was when I just gave birth to CJ, someone gave me a book. The book states that babies are actually very strong. When he was born, he didn’t need anything to support, he didn’t need anything and he has the ability to adapt to this world. Then there is another very correct thing that my pastor told me, children come to your world, they come to join you, not you to accommodate them, not you to accommodate them.
Adele: Then I know Jmie, you have been a mother for more than 100 days, how is your mood?
Jmie: I have a little postpartum blues but I didn’t think so at first. After the baby is born, there are many changes. It’s normal to have mood swings like this and then maybe because of the hormones. Then it was mild at first and I kept ignoring it and wanted to try to recover. And until the end I feel it’s getting worse, I don’t know why I’m in such a bad mood and will not feel happy at all. If I’m not interested in anything then I’ll find out why. I couldn’t find the reason, so I blamed my husband.
I think it’s my husband’s problem, he might not cooperate, or what is not considerate enough, but it’s actually because of my hormones. And that recently is that life change, I can’t switch to being a mother all of a sudden. You know, the identity becomes more than many things were not done before. Then there are some regrets and I’ve been trying to make peace with myself.
Adele: I had it the first month too. When you just said it, I actually think back about that moment, I really can’t understand.
Jmie: And the moment she was born I have this feeling. Then the next morning when I woke up to breastfeed, I was still happy. Then slowly I got covid, I was isolated from her on the third day and I started to have that strong feeling. Just, why do I have to worry about my kids all the time? I became a mother who has to worry about the children all the time. There is also the opinion of many people.
Adele: Ignore it, it doesn’t look good when people see this. I tell you I don’t listen. Because to me, everyone is the best mother. You are the best mom for CJ. No mother is going to hurt.
Jmie: Own children.
Adele: Yes, unless you are really sick. My husband and I set up this rule, it’s the two of us no matter what we do, I just need to run through my husband. You also talked about PCOS before, right? What advice do you have for women who still have PCOS now? Anything else you can share?
Jmie: I just don’t think it’s a serious problem. It’s actually very common, that’s what a lot of women have. Face it squarely, and then slowly change such things to adjust. Because PCOS you really cannot stress. When it’s more urgent, it’s more counterproductive. At that time, I was quite stressed for a while, I’m so stressed that I can’t menstruate at all. The whole person is in a very depressed mood because you know sometimes when your period doesn’t come, it will have a feeling that can’t come.
Adele: I know that feeling.
Jmie: Yes, it seems that menstruation comes, but it doesn’t come like this. Then I’ll keep trying other ways, hey, how do I get my period? I drink this and try that again. And when it turns out it doesn’t work, it gets worse, exercise is also important.
Adele: We have come to the last question, Jmie, I think I can share with you, now you’re a mother and take care of your career. What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever heard from someone?
Jmie: They are actually an asset so they are a luck and blessing. He is here to join your life, I actually didn’t think of this sentence before. Then I have been stuck on that oh I’m a mom now. I’m a perfectionist, so I always need to give her the best and worry too much about her. I had covid a while ago, after covid I denggi again, I’m that kind of fear and anxious. I even seem to have that kind of mosquito outside the window, I also watch for mosquitos in the night. Then buy a bunch of that mosquito repellant, I’m afraid it will bite my baby. Then I adjusted it and let it be.
Adele: What do you think of the girl or boy who is watching this podcast, if today they want to ask you a piece of life advice? What would you suggest to them?
Jmie: Living in the moment, really don’t worry too much about what will happen in the future. When you are doing something now, you are really going to do it well. No matter what position you are in, you just give full play to what you want to play in your current position. I think that’s the best thing to do.
Adele: Really thank you Jmie for your time today and CJ. If you like this video, remember to share it and then be sure to check Jmie out and follow all her socials. Thank you Jmie.
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